I realize it has been several (GASP) years since I updated this blog. A lot has happened in the past few years....and I do mean A LOT! I only stumbled on this blog again out of curiosity and found to my surprise that it was actually still here. I began to read my own writing and realized how humbling, and how amazing, this blog really was for me.
I originally abandoned the blog because of a few "bad seeds" discouraging my work. I know now just how wrong this was. I also know that God has called me to this calling, and I can no longer deny this. After rereading some of my original posts on this blog I can see now that my own self doubt was so very wrong. God has most definitely called me back to this place and nothing can stop the will of God!
After a very personal tragedy in my life (the sudden, but not unexpected death of my young, 49 year old mom last week) I am reaching out for change in my life. I think that's what led to my seeking out this blog again. I just have a strong desire to get back to where God called me. I am reaching for something more, and I am letting God take me there.
I was healed, by God, of depression back in 2006, and I refuse to ever go back to that dark place again. I'm going to allow my mom's life and death to inspire something good in me, not bring me back down, so that is why I am here again. In some ways I feel like the prodigal daughter returning to her father.
I have to admit that I not only abandoned this blog, but overtime, after some very personal issues (the death of a close friend, and the birth of a beautiful baby girl), and a lot of discouraging words, I also abandoned my church women and the JOY group. I cannot apologize enough for this. All I can do is return to what God gave me - the calling to lead others, and myself, to joy and health. My entire life is one big testimony, and it is up to me, and only me, to allow that testimony to shine - not hide from it. So with that said I have decided the time has come to return. I'm going to be walking very slowly at first, maybe even crawling, but I am coming back - and God's going to move mountains for me - I can just feel it deep within.
I have learned one important lesson in the past few years: When God gives you a calling and a ministry He will make a way - but only if you obey the call. Not everyone will be on board, but that is not your concern. Not everyone agreed with Jesus' work either, but that did not stop Him. He didn't need a fancy building to do His work, or special circumstances. He ignored the scoffers, preached anyway - sometimes with nothing more than a hill of grass under his feet, and now His message lives on! God wants to do great things in our lives, but we too often let the thoughts of others dictate what we can and cannot do. God said go and do, so we must do just that and nothing else.
I was going to start an entirely new blog, but after reading this blog I realized it is already a great format and why should I mess with what works? The only thing I am changing is the template with a slightly newer design because the original html / design no longer works. I am leaving all of the original posts up for reference. I cannot guarantee how often I will post here, but just knowing the blog is still here gives me encouragement to go forth.
Pray for me.
